Happy Birthday to Me

Well, my birthday has come and gone and I guess I would like to rant a little. I feel kind of let down. On my birthday I got one phone call, and it was from my mom. I know people are busy and so I shouldn't judge them for not calling, but I guess I just feel unloved. My sister Krissa called on Saturday (the day before), so I don't blame her. My brother is in China and he emailed me, so I don't blame him (with 14-hour difference, it's hard for us to talk when neither is asleep or at work). Still, I feel unloved. I have no friends who I'm still in touch with who thought to call. No one at church said happy birthday (even though it was printed in the bulletin). No one on MySpace thought to say happy birthday besides my sister Marcie, (even though there should have been a reminder on my pic that my birthday was coming up. At least I've noticed that with others' pics). I really appreciate the clothes she sent me, too (just wanted to make sure she knows I appreciate it!).

Overall, the day was boring. Aaron had cleaned the apartment the day before as a gift, but he was sick on my birthday so wasn't up to doing anything really. No friends in the area to do something with.

I know, I'm pathetic.

But I think it stems from more than just this birthday. I think it comes from being born around Thanksgiving. I know it's not as bad as being born around Christmas, but it just seems like no one remembers. I remember for my 12th birthday I invited four friends for a slumber party (I don't remember when it was in relation to Thanksgiving). One told me before hand that she could not come, but the other three just didn't show up. I waited all night for them to come and by 9 or so, I realized that none were coming. 

In my teen years, I had to share a party with my brother who is two years older and has a birthday two weeks after mine. We'd usually have it about a week after my birthday in early December. These were usually disappointing (I think partly because we lived in the middle of no where, 15 miles from a small town). 

And don't even mention cake! I never got one that I can remember. My mom would be so burnt out from cooking for Thanksgiving that usually one of the pies for Thanksgiving was my "birthday pie." Needless to say, it didn't make me feel very special. I remember my sister, whose birthday is in June, getting ice cream cake when I was a kid and I didn't even get a cake at all.

Once I got to college, everyone in my building would leave for Thanksgiving, I'd have my birthday, and then they would come back and not even know that I'd had it. And I'm not really one to be like, "It's my birthday next week." I would mention it to a few good friends, but even they usually didn't remember, or they would be like, "It was your birthday, right? Happy birthday." And that was it.

My freshman year my birthday was the day after Thanksgiving. I'd ridden with a girl in my dorm to Colorado to visit my dad. The boy I liked at the time lived in the same city as my dad, and I was hoping we could hang out together. My dad and step-mom had gone somewhere and so I was literally alone on my birthday (I can't remember what it was, I just remember they were gone all day). I'd only visited the area for a few weeks a year, so I knew no one there other than this boy. He said he could probably hang out and so I was looking forward to it. I called him like 20 times that day trying to get a hold of him and find out when we could hang out. Pretty much that scared him away because he thought I was crazy for calling that much. Excuse me for wanting to do something for my birthday rather than sit at home alone. I didn't even have a car, so I couldn't even go out somewhere by myself. That was a horrible birthday. (And it doesn't help that my dad doesn't believe in birthday gifts once you're an adult, so I didn't even get any gifts that day).

I do remember my sophomore year one of my roommates having a party for me with cake and decorations. That was really nice and a fond memory. I just wish that sort of thing happened more often. 

So I guess my frustrations and pessimism about birthdays stem from these experiences. It doesn't help, either, that my husband's birthday is 8 days before mine. I'm once again sharing a birthday and so it seems like my birthday is overshadowed. We get our birthday cards at the same time, we have a party together (if we have one, since we have to plan it when we do), and since Aaron's the typical male, he doesn't do anything elaborate. I did appreciate him cleaning last Saturday. That was very nice of him, but it would be nice to have something that really says, "You're special. I love you."

Ack.

Happy Thanksgiving!

In honor of Thanksgiving, I want to say what I'm thankful for. I'm thankful for my husband who loves me and gives me lots of affection. I'm also thankful for his hard work in school so he can do well in his classes.

I'm thankful for my job that pays the bills (although I look forward to when I won't need to work). I'm thankful that it's close to where I live and for my boss who is understanding and who doesn't micromanage.

I'm thankful for my apartment that has covered parking (essential in Utah where you would otherwise have frost or snow on your car every winter morning). I'm also thankful for it having a laundry room and a second bedroom.

I'm thankful for my family who loves me and supports me. Especially my mom who I feel lets me live my life and trusts me to make good decisions.

I'm thankful for living in the United States where I have freedoms and where the economy is good. I'm thankful that I don't live in a third world country and that I speak English. And I'm thankful for military personnel who work every day to protect us and help those in other countries who need help.

I'm thankful that I will be able to go home for Christmas (it's been three years).

I'm thankful to have good health and to not have any chronic illness (such as diabetes, depression, or chronic fatigue).

I'm thankful to be such a blessed person. This is not to say that I don't have trials or anything bad in my life, but I think it's better to focus on what is good and right rather than what could make it better. I am grateful for what I have.

Happy Thanksgiving!

End of Cell Phone Woes

So finally my cell phone frustrations (i.e. not having one) have ending. This is in response to my previous cell phone rant in August. As of today, my cell phone will be arriving at my house. My husband's phone arrived last Friday, but I guess since my phone model is really popular, it's taking a little longer. I was able to get two free Razr V3 phones (one dark grey, one magenta) with $50 rebate on each (so $100 back total). We went with T-Mobile since they had the best deal on the phones, a pretty good plan (700 shared minutes with free nights and weekends for $59.99), and people I know in the area who have them have been pleased generally with the service. So that's exciting. For those wondering what my phone number is on the phone, I'm in the middle of transfering our home phone number to it, so that I won't have to worry about making sure everyone knows the new number, and since we're going to get rid of our home phone and just use cell phones, this will make it easier. So, anyway, very exciting news (for me anyway).

Happy Halloween!

Okay, so I decided to actually dress up for Halloween. I like the dressing up, but I hate the deciding and getting things for a costume. But I was inspired and decided to be a . . .

mime!

It was something I could without much planning. In fact, I decided to do it last night. White shirt, black pants, black jacket, add to it white gloves from my wedding and face make-up I got at the store and voila. I got the make-up when I thought I might be a geisha, but I decided against the geisha idea when I realized I couldn't get me hair to look like that and a wig would be expensive. It turned out to be a good decision, though, since a woman in my church decided to be a geisha and I wouldn't want to be a repeat. Anyway, so I used the makeup to be a mime instead.

Next time I have a costume with make-up, I want to get stage makeup instead. I hated working with this stuff. The pictures on the packaging looked all wonderful with thick makeup, but this stuff is so thin. Definitely not thick enough to be a real mime. I hope next time I'll be able to get good stage makeup and use that. It looks much better!

Finally

I'm just about as excited as can be! I've been a temp now for 18 months and for the last 6 they've been talking about hiring me on as a regular employee. It almost seemed like it wasn't going to happen. Then two weeks ago my job was posted on the company's employment Web site. This was a big step. I wanted to tell everyone, but I figured I should wait till I was actually hired. You never know till it's official. My boss wasn't planning on hiring anyone else, but what if a really impressive resume came by.

Yesterday my boss came by and told me that if all went according to plan then I'd be given an offer letter today. Well, you'd think I'd be excited, right? I was, but I was also worried. My boss had said something a month ago to make me believe that I wouldn't be getting paid anymore. At the time when he said I about wanted to kill him because last December he said it would be $2 more an hour and I had been planning on that since. But I decided to hold on and see what the offer was. Maybe I misinterpreted. Plus, one of my mentors has recommended me read these books that talk about thoughts and how you can make things happen by what you think about. So I kept my thoughts on what I wanted to be paid, which was $4 more an hour (so twice as much as what he told me he'd be paying). I thought about what I'd do with that much money, how things would change, how I would save some of it, etc.

Well, I was at work working on some stuff, and my phone rings. I look at the caller ID and it's my boss. I pick it up and he asks if I can come into his office. I figured he was going to give me the offer letter. Immediately butterflies in my stomach started fluttering and I said a quick prayer asking God to help me know what I should say if he gives me a lower pay than what I wanted. Then I got up and walked to his office (feeling quite sick, I might add). I sat down and he closed the door. He had the paperwork in his hand and starting talking about what he will expect of me now that I'm an employee (assuming I accept the offer, of course). He sat down rolled over to where I was sitting. I could see the offer on the top page. Finally, I was able to relax. Not only was it $2 more an hour, but it was actually $3.38 more an hour (so quite close to the amount I had been thinking of). I could hardly keep from smiling, but I didn't want him to think I was too excited--he might wonder if he were offering me too much.

He talked to me a little more about what the offer entailed including benefits and what forms I needed to fill out. I had to go home and get my social security card because they needed to enter my information today. Apparently my official start date was last Monday, and to get me into the payroll system, they needed to get my paperwork today. So I went home to pick it up. I figured I'd fill out the papers at home so i could be sure there wasn't anything else I needed. By then it was time for my husband to be walking home from class, so I drove by and picked him up. Then I handed him the offer letter and said, "I want you to read this." When he got to the salary he turned to me smiling. "Wow." "I know," I replied. "Great, huh? More than what we expected." I dropped him off at home and then headed back to work. I handed in the paperwork to HR and so now it's official. I have a salaried job that pays much better than anything else I've gotten and has great benefits. Yay! It's so exciting! Now I'm going to go plan a new budget, which will include a cell phone for each of us.

Financial Stress Relieved

Well, my financial stress has been relieved. My credit card's payment was due today and on Friday we received the loan check in the mail. We went to the bank and put it in there and made the credit card payment online. The credit card is paid off (with no interest), and we are no longer scrambling for money (not that we could not use more, of course, just that we're not dying anymore). Yeah!

Going to Lake Powell

I'm so excited. I found out last Friday that I'm going to Lake Powell this weekend. It's been a possibility for a few weeks, but I didn't know for sure till then. It's going to be so much fun. If you've never been to Lake Powell, make it a point to go. It's just about the best lake ever (partially because it's so big, and is also a great location). I hear this is a good time to go because it's not quite so hot, but still warm, and cools off at night.

Basically, a millionaire I know, John (who I've mentioned before), is letting a group of us go down and stay at one of his house boats (he has two). We're going to swim, hike, hang out, have fun, and learn from John about how to be successful in life. It's going to be great. I'll let you all know how it goes when I get back.

In other news, to make up for the day off I'm taking (since I still don't have paid vacation) and to try to get money to pay for Aaron's schooling, I'm doing some freelance work this week. So pretty much I'm working 12 hours a day. I know many who do this on a regular basis, but I just don't know how they do it. I guess we just push ourselves to do what we need to do, but it's still hard (unless of course you love the work so much it doesn't seem like a job). I am grateful for my job and the freelance work, though.